Wow 2 posts in 2 days. As I sit here at my computer, little feet patter up and so sweetly ask for some orange juice. Kind words for a tired momma. It has been a long week, full of tiredness and emotions. Struggling to make all the ends meet and work. Children who feel my stress and react with bad behavior, momma's tired and does not handle it well. Sometimes its hard to do this alone. God's natural order is for 2 parents for when one falls the other can lift him up. When I fall who is there. Maybe not a physical person but God is (and my poor mom who has to listen to me cry 25o0 miles away). But I yearn for the physical embrace of a partner someone to hold me at night and hug all my fears away. But God can do that, but do I allow him to. Maybe this is my path until I decide (open my heart) that he is all I really need. My grace is sufficient for thee. Help me be open to your loving arms and not be looking for comfort from expectations.
Life is hard, but many are much worse of than I am. I have my health and the kids health we have a place to lay our heads. We have a loving Father in heaven who is watching over us, taking care of us, and ultimately building us a place for eternity that will never have any of the problems we face here on earth.

The Lord Bless us and Keep us and give us Peace. Praying for the peace that passeth all understanding.

One week ago today

One week ago today at 10:38 am est my father entered into the presense of our Lord. We were able to say good bye. I have lost my father and my children have lost their pop pops and my mother has lost her husband of 42 years. We knew it was coming, still it is so sad to think of all the things we will not be able to do with him. He passed away on his 70th birthday. A mile stone he wanted to make. I know thathe wanted a birthday party, we wanted to give it to him here on earth, God wanted to give him one in heaven, which I am sure surpassed anything we could have done. I was able to say Goodbye and tell him everything I needed to.
How was I so blessed to have parents that have prayed for me and loved me and taught me the things that are important. God first. Parents who took me to Sunday School and to the Remebrance of the Lord on Sundays, Christian school, bible conference, and Camps. What a difference if it was not this way. But our parents can not choose for us to be Christians to follow the Lord, its a path we must choose for ourselves. I made tht choice long ago and have strayed from it often. The Lord has brought me back often on my knees. Someone sent me a note saying how he does not refine us using anesthesia but often the hard way, I know that is how I have and its also how I have learned. Lord help me to stand up and stand strong and walk with you whatever the path YOU have chosen for me to go. Thank you for my parents. Let me be an example to my children that my parents were to me. Please Lord let the circle be unbroken.

What do I have to say today. We went and got Max's haircut for our trip to NJ can not let everyone think we are too hippyish.

I have had a really low time this week, I just get stuck in my own head..... but Friday Max and I went to the beach while much to Olivia's unhappiness she was at school ( I am raising beach bums) It just grounds me, we ran and played and swang. Looking at the ocean I do not understand how anyone could not believe in our awesome GOD. Its so amazing and powerful and peaceful too. I pray that I never live to far from the ocean. (I think I have some salt water in the blood)

I am learning to trust still and its all I need to do. Have faith walk and not run. Sometimes its a crawl but it is forward motion !!!!!!

Life is Good, we are healthy, my kids are healthy, We have a loving God he is all we need

Valentines Day

Well it has definitely been a week. My cooler broke and my poor doggies both got colitis and it was Valentines Day on a saturday of a long weekend. Not the day I was needing, but the Lord provided what he we needed. (At first I wrote what he thought we needed but apptly put would be what I thought he needed to provide) unfortunately I was praying for different outcome. But he is in charge.
I survived and I paid a bill he just keeps me on such a tight leash its good for me makes me walk by faith (which I still struggle with) Sometimes my struggle is brief and then I realize we are nestled in the palm of our hand, he is our Shephard none shall pluck us out of his hand. We are safe we are loved we are where we need to be.

Lord let me be content!!! let me hold on!!!! let me walk in faith!!!!

Thank you Jesus for your love and kindness, for my children, for being raised in a Christian family, for parents who have spent many times on their knees on my behalf.

Thank you Jesus that I have been chosen

A new day

Its funny. I often feel lonely but lately I have had the pleasure of emailing 2 very old friends and its amazing how good it felt to "talk" to them again.

I feel so cold in my worship lately, I want to feel like talking to the Lord is like talking to an old friend. But right now I am just doing it. Reading, praying but I want to feel alive like coming to his word and kneeling in prayer is more than just an action.

We have so many blessings from above and we have so much to be thankful for may we never forget that he brings so many blessings and knowing him is such a honor and a privilege and not something that should be done but something we yearn to do.

My prayer is for the yearning again

Plaguerizing

IS that even the correct way to spell it.

These are not mine but 2 daily devotions I receive and these were on the same day!!!!!!!

HMMMM

Could not pound into my head any better

WELL SAID (I can say that since its not patting myself on the back as I am plaguerizing : )!!!!! )


VERSE:

Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed, for his

compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your

faithfulness.

-- Lamentations 3:22-23

THOUGHT:

What sustained you through the night? What will get you through

today? What will enable you to achieve your goals, even thrive, in

the days that lie ahead? The LORD's mercies. These incredible

resources never run out! Each new day brings a fresh supply of

them. God is faithful to make sure we have them each day. Praise be

to God for making our world new and clean each new day.

For God is not a God of confusion but of peace.
1 Corinthians 14:33a

If you're looking for God to show you something clearly, don't over-pollute what He's showing you with the thoughts and reasoning of your own mind. God has given you a mind to use, and at the same time, He has given you the Holy Spirit to help, guide and discern what is of Him and what is of the flesh. Use both, but rely most on the unchanging nature of God to ultimately guide you in the way that you should go.

The End of the Year

Out with the old in with the new. This has been a year, changes and more changes laughter and tears.

Filled with learning and relearning...trusting and wavering. Making a resolution will you stick with it, I make many resolutions but not in the new year's eve. Intention ... high to keep them going reality not so high but I try and I will keep trying.

If I look around I see answers to prayers, I do not even need to look far or hard, He has carried us through this year, He has never faltered, I many a times have I faltered.

I simply want to thank him. Thank you for walking with me and carrying me and being with me. I never would have made it alone. Help me to continue putting your will in front of mine. You are so much better at this.

HAPPY NEW YEAR, may I come to love you even more.